Step By Step

This summer, we had the unusual opportunity for some extended time off from our regular work.  I'd been wrestling with some uncertainty, and so also intentionally put this to the side in order to rest and have a bit of fun.  On return from a special holiday, and back to 'normality,' I began to re-engage with what had been weighing heavy on my heart, and particularly praying for clarity and direction.

I'm not keen on, "God told me..." type statements, because they imply that there's no room for questioning.  It seems wise to also remain open to others' discernment or better understanding.  Still, over the years I have had numerous experiences of God's clear leading, including in response to some very specific requests for guidance.  After pouring out my heart to God, there have been moments when I've got up off the floor (literally) and known with utter clarity and conviction what is the next step to take in a particular situation that had seemed impossible to navigate (see James 1:5-8).

Even though I remember this with deep gratitude, when facing another issue that I'm very unsure how to approach, I sometimes feel like I'll never see clearly.  I have heard of God's faithful leading; I have experienced it myself countless times.  In any given situation, though, this doesn't always feel reliable.  Towards the end of the summer, I found myself clinging to what I know of God whilst unable to feel its certainty.  "God, please show me how to conduct myself in this situation.  It feels like I'll never see the way forward.  I need you to lead me..."

Photo credit: Chris Lund

Life holds some defining moments.  A particular day, or even a few minutes, can influence someone's journey in a way that stands out from the humdrum.  Some steps feel like really big ones.  If you look back at the journey to any 'big step' moment, though, there's usually a trail of small steps behind you, each one contributing to the overall direction.  It's sometimes possible to make a drastic change, but more often yesterday's priorities become the vantage point from which today's choices make sense.

When facing uncertainty, or something that feels like a big decision, it's so helpful to know with confidence that I'm right here as a result of following the Holy Spirit's leading in a whole heap of small things.  Even more beautiful, though, is that God offers grace for those things in which I didn't get it right, and is able to teach and mature me—if I'm willing to be reshaped.  When my character or approach is questioned, when what I've worked towards is threatened or even taken away, how will I respond?  I'm learning that in seeking to take each step in Jesus, humility plays a huge part.

This year, a gentle whisper into my soul has helped me to persevere, step by step: faithfulness in the unseen places fosters the depth of character that God considers trustworthy. ⬦

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